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Chat Post Tue, Feb. 28, 2012 46 notes

CBS's "Elementary" Season 1

  • Joan Watson: hey where did my medical degree go where did my apartment go where did my money go whoops better stay with this exotic creepy dude who's from across the pond
  • Sherlock Holmes: THIS IS NEW YORK... CONCRETE JUNGLE WHERE DETECTIVES ARE MADE OF-
  • Joan Watson: hey you're a recovering drug addict right we should stay with each other I'm-
  • Sherlock Holmes: judging by the huge flag you're carrying you're American and judging by the broken stethoscope around your neck and the ghost of an old lady flying around your head I deduce that you are a surgeon who lost her medical license because your patient died
  • Joan Watson: oh my God that's really amazing but annoying why does this make me want to jump you also your name is weird but your face is yum
  • *heterosexual tension*
  • Sherlock Holmes: let's live together and let me be endearing to the general public with my british sensibilities and make you tea with crumpets
  • Joan Watson: okay your face is srsly yum oh my god but let me make you jealous
  • Other Guy: hay Joan
  • Joan Watson: hay other guy with whom I've had the sexing with many times
  • Sherlock Holmes: I don't care I'm not jealous look at me I'm a psychopath
  • *jealous*
  • Sherlock Holmes: so what can we do for fun other than pretend we're not attracted to each other for the next 9 episodes
  • Joan Watson: I used to work for this guy called Charlie but now I consult with the NYPD because they don't have their own medical examiners or something
  • Sherlock Holmes: bet I can solve all the crimes in new york city before this dude Lestrade can
  • Joan Watson: if you win, we make out. if i win, we make out
  • Sherlock Holmes: blimey wanker crumpets jesus
  • *goes to crime scene*
  • *solves crimes with deductions*
  • *more heterosexual tension*
  • *drama about drug use*
  • *lame British/American differences jokes*
  • *even more heterosexual tension*
  • *repeat for the next 22 episodes*
  • The End.



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    "blimey wanker crumpets jesus" HAHAHAHA
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